Novel...Forgiveness for cheaters?

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I just finished this book. Have you read it?

Interesting....

(SPOILER ALERT--DON'T READ IF YOU WANT TO READ THE BOOK)

Husband cheats. Wife discovers. To forgive or not?

My sister dealt with this...I know every situation is different. Her husband was a serial cheater. In the book, it was a one time deal.

Does this matter? Or should I say, would it matter to you?

I've always said I would leave no matter what! I don't even want to think about it....ugh.

I have some friends who have left, and some who have stayed. I am also hesitant to admit that a long time ago (before I was married) ...I worked with someone who was "the other woman"....she says it was/is her biggest regret. I really have trouble with dishonesty.

I think I would constantly worry and question.

In the book, it brings up staying for the kids. Is this a good thing?

This book was a great read, but really got me to thinking...maybe b/c my sister has just gone through her horrible ordeal.

What are your thoughts?

The ONE Thing

I am a perfectionist. That is...in all things, but my weight. Please believe me, I am not perfect. But I feel good about my job as a wife, mother, and teacher. Even good about my relationhips with others who are important to me: my role as a daughter, sister, and friend. (Well, maybe I struggle with my MIL, but you know...) My point is that I feel good about everything, BUT MY WEIGHT!

It's my ONE thing. Why is this?

I woke up last night thinking about this. I'm not sure where the moment came from...but I suddenly realized something.

I am successful at things I try to do my best at. I rarely attempt anything that I will fail at. Hence, the perfectionism.

I suddenly realized that my "perfectionist" quality may be holding me back in the weight loss department. I think I'm not trying as hard as I could because I don't feel I can be perfect.

That's when it hit me:
I don't have to be perfect...just better.

Let me repeat that:

I don't have to be perfect...just better.

I can just do better at exercising.

I can just be a better size clothing.

I can be in better shape.

I can eat better.

I can FEEL better.

Not to expect perfection...just be better.

I think this may be KEY for me.

What do you think?

J

Bloggy Bullying

I like to click on the your blogs that I follow and then visit blogs that you follow, too! It is a great way to find new blogs. Sometimes, I also click on the blogs of your commentors if I really like something they said.

The other day, I stumbled onto a blog (who shall remain nameless)...I am pretty certain I discovered some bloggy bullying. This blog was attacking another blogger ferociously...and not being so nice to others! Wow, I was shocked.

I found myself hoping that this never happens to me!

The teacher in me wanted to say things like:

• let's all play nice!"
• live and let live
• don't say anything if you can't say something nice
• reading someone's blog is a choice. if you don't like it, don't read it

Have you ever seen anything like this?
J

Breakfast for a gang

I had my nephews staying with us this morning. I decided to make a breakfast dish my family loves. I forgot to take the picture before they all dug in...so you get the half eaten version!

So easy! (not low fat by any means!!! But you could adjust recipe a little if you want to lessen the calories. I like it b/c it goes a long way when you have to feed the gang! Scamble eggs and put out fresh fruit...waa--lah, breakfast is served!

Ingredients:
2 packages of crescent rolls (8 count)
1 package of cream cheese (8 oz. I think)
1 pound of sausage (I use mild, but you can go as spicey as you need!)

(to make the dish healthier, you could use turkey sausage, lite cream cheese, and low fat crescents)

Directions:
scamble the sausage til cooked, then drain
add in cream cheese
mix cream cheese and sausage well

In a 13x9 greased dish ( I use Pam), put down one package of crescent rolls flat. Pour sausage mixture on top, then lay out the other package of crescent rolls on top. Bake until crescents on top are done.

Yum!

Public vs. Private

Do you eat differently in private than you do in public?

I do. I admit here, on this blog.

I would never eat an entire bag of truffles in public...but I have in private.

I would never eat 5 pieces of pizza in public...but I have in private.

I would never eat 4 waffles in public...but I have in private.

I would never eat and eat and eat and eat until I felt sick in public, but oh, I have in private.

See a pattern here. I think I will try pretending that I am eating with a crowd around me all the time. :)
Maybe that will help!


In other news, I ended my Diet Coke addiction (again) yesterday.
My eating was moderate...not perfect. So I'll start my 14 days over again today. grumph! At least it wasn't as bad as it has been! 

Talk to you later!
J

A New Bathing Suit

I have been on the hunt for the PERFECT Bathing Suit.

Is there such a thing?

I want flattering and inexpensive....

I've worn a tankini for a few years now. The kind that doesn't show the tummy, but I can still tinkle on having to pull down the bottoms...very convenient. I also have a long torso and these just feel better.

I've been having trouble with the halter necklines. It is very hard to find a different neckline...or at least it has been to me.

I also always stick with black, brown, or darker colors...

But the other day, I saw this in Target:

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Sorry the picture is so small, but it was too blurry when I made it bigger. You can click the link to see it larger if you want. This top is so wonderful. It is perfect to wear strapless for no tan lines! I have NEVER worn a strapless top...well since high school maybe. Anyway, I have gotten so many compliments since I've had it. My husband said it is the best fit I've worn in a long time. I'm going to get one in another color...and it was only 20 bucks.

I really want to get a nice suit when I lose weight...hmmm, have we heard that before?

I love suits from Athleta and similar stores, but just don't want to fork out $150 for a swimsuit. Maybe a weight loss treat for goal?

Have you found good bathing suits? Share the details!

J

Friend Makin' Mondays

It's time for Friend Makin' Monday! Go over to Kenz's blog to link up!

Here's what Kenz says: If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

FMM: Yes or No?

Do you use coupons? Very rarely...I always forget. But I sure do admire people who save loads of money.

Do you like football? Yes...my husband loves this about me! ;-)

Are you in a relationship? Yes, married. We've been together for about 14 years...I'm more in love now than ever! What a blessing!

Is your phone always within arm’s reach? No…most of time time, yes…but not always..

Do you like thunderstorms? Storms don't bother me, but I hate windy storms. I have a fear of trees hitting the house.

Can you cook? Yes, but I go through spells of cooking a lot and not. It usually depends on how hectic life is at the time.

Are you – or have you – lost weight? Yes…but need to lose MORE.

Do you know how to read a map? Yes

Do you wear makeup? Yes! I believe in less is more, though. As I get older, I have found myself using more....to cover "things"

Do you read regularly? Yes. I LOVE TO READ.

Are you publicly affectionate? Yes, but in an appropriate way.

Do you like picnics? Yes! As long as it isn't too buggy.

Do you have a/c? Yes! This is a must have...I don't like to be hot.

Have you ever been out of the country? Yes!

Do you know how to ride a bicycle? Yes

Okay, now it’s your turn to answer the questions! And these are easy, right? Don’t forget to come back and link up! And have a happy Monday! =)

J

Happy Father's Day!

My husband is a wonderful FATHER!

I am so thankful for him and for the blessing he is to me and our children.

Happy Father's Day!

J

Is this my personality or another weight issue?

I was out with my family this week. We went to a small pizza pub ...very casual.



I was with my two GORGEOUS SISTERS...who are thin. One showed up straight from work the other had been swimming with me.


Working sister was in killer heels (I don't know how she walked in them) and a body skimming dress. She was accessorized to the hilt.


Swimming sister put on a beautiful, bright, colorful maxi dress. Put some "product" on her hair to creak a sleek pony tail and big earrings were added.


Me: pony tail --not the sleek kind, the kind that says...I've been swimming so I just put my hair up. I also wore flip flops, shorts, and a t-shirt. In my defense, it was a cute t-shirt, but I still had a case of the "inadequates"


So...it led to a conversation with my husband:

• do you wish I dressed cuter?
• do you wish I put more effort into my appearance?
• do you wish I dressed sexier?
• do you wish I ALWAYS looked like I stepped out of a magazine?

I'm sure I drove him half crazy with all of the questions. Of course, he said he loves me just like I am... he knows how to answer to keep himself out of trouble.


He actually prefers me very natural...if he had his way, I'd never wear make-up.

I can dress up...and I do when I feel it is necessary or the situation calls for it.

My question to myself is...am I this way b/c it is more my personality or I am not trying for the cute looks because of my weight?


(Am I rambling?)

I am definitely a less is more person. I do know that I prefer to save my "sexiness" for private moments with my husband (which really isn't affected by weight at all...surprisingly...maybe I try to suck in at times, but overall very good in that area). I'm definitely not the trendiest, but not the old lady either...somewhere in the middle.

Does this even matter?

Well, not what I wear. But, why do I feel the constant need to compare myself to others????!!!

Will I ever stop this madness?

***Do you ever feel anything like this?

J


NEW GOAL---Going for 2 weeks of perfect eating to try to get myself on track! :)

I must remember...

I will remember being in the dressing room and feeling like crying

I will remember sucking in and trying to sit "just right" while in my swimsuit

I will remember being embarrassed by my arms in a sleeveless shirt

I will remember feeling sick after a binge

I will remember feeling judged by my weight rather than by ME

I will remember feeling compared to my thin sisters and thus feeling inadequate

I will remember sitting in the pool rather than jumping off the diving board b/c I didn't want my fat to shake

I will remember avoiding having my picture taken

I will remember bringing my clothes home to try on rather than doing it at the store...maybe I felt thinner at home

I will remember dreading the scale at the doctor's office

I will remember wanting to feel sexy while making love to my husband

I will remember feeling my muscles when I run

I will remember feeling energized when I drank water and ate right

I will remember the feeling of satisfaction when I make good choices all day

I will remember feeling victory when I see a loss on the scale

I will remember trying on a smaller size pants...and they fit

I will remember gaining confidence

Here's to remembering and doing everything to never go back
J

Eating right?

I've been trying to get back on track...is summer tough for anyone else?

Snacks seem to multiply right before my eyes! Especially when we are out boating...a little bag of chips is so much easier to take than fruit that needs to be kept cold. I can come up with a million excuses...hee hee hee.

I'm tired of maintaining and need to get back on the losses.

I've been thinking of having 10 days of no carbs and seeing what happens. I was reading Dawne's blog about the Dukan Diet...couldn't resist checking it out. It said my true weight is 153 pounds. According to the website, I can reach this weight by September if I "just follow their meal plan." Oh, if only it were that easy, right? We could all lose weight if we just followed THE PLAN. regardless of the plan...just follow it.

I know this...

I want this...

I can do it...

J

Yes, Mam

So, my boss called. They've made decisions which affect our school that the faculty doesn't really agree with nor understand. It's stressing me out, but what can I do? It is completely out of my control.

I've prayed the Lord will give me a peace about the situations and that I will learn to accept that those in our leadership at school have the authority...not me.

Just have to let it go....
say "yes, mam" and be a good steward of the school

Can you tell I needed to vent?
J

In a Bubble

do you ever wish you could live in bubble?

last night, i woke in the middle of the night...stressed about work and the addition to our home. I found myself wishing we (hubs and kids) could just live in a bubble...not having to worry about other people.

of course, this feeling is totally incomplete...i would really miss my sisters and parents. mother in law? not so much. :) and of course, i do have friends that i would miss terribly.

why was i feeling this way? i think i just don't want to be bothered...with money issues, work issues, MIL issues...with weight

i almost asked my hubs if he could live with me just like i am forever. then, i could put away this weight problem, right? wrong.

the problem is not with him. it is with me. he loves me. has never said a thing. although i am sure he likes this body better than the 222 pound body i once had. and he probably remembers distantly the 125 pound body that he married....oh, the days. anyway...he doesn't care.

i care

i want to lose the weight forever

that is the biggest problem for me

the work stuff--out of my control

the money stuff over renovations---going to be fabulous when it's over, papers are signed, deal is done

i need to get back on the weight...it's weighing me down

From Envy to Admiration

(Just want to start off by saying...What is wrong with Blogger and commenting? Anyone else having trouble? I haven't been able to comment on your lovely blogs for several days!)

Anyway, back to my title...From Envy to Admiration

I've been spending time at the pool with my sisters. My sister that had a baby just a little while ago...is already back in her bikini! If you remember, she was the one who joined Weight Watchers to lose 15 pounds. Well, she did it and lost even more. She is so thin!

Our weekend began with me turning GREEN with envy! I'm serious. I couldn't stop staring at her...looking for the little belly baby bulge...nope, not there. I was like "LIFE is not fair!" Whining inside my head like a freakin' baby! I swear! I did that for about 2 days.

THEN, I realized...I should not be envious! I should admire her. She doesn't really enjoy exercise but she sure does have A-MA-ZING self control when eating! I really admire that. Not to say she doesn't ever indulge, she does. But in MODERATION....something I've forgotten the past 2 months.

My other sister....is the athlete! She runs and runs and runs. She is also very fit and trim. Then, she eats like a MAN! She's not trying to lose- just maintain.

So, I've learned to stop whining and admire them. Stop whining and DO IT!

Get back on the train...and do it!
LOSE IT!

Here's my restart...again.
J

SCHOOL'S....

OUT FOR SUMMER!!!!!

Anyone else remember that tune? I sing it every year at the end of my school year!

I am finally able to relax--just a bit. I am going straight from work into home remodeling. I am going to deny myself stress eating! I figure if I say  "I am going to" rather than "I will try to" it sounds better. :)

Again, I have to report that I have just been maintaining. I hope to start losing this week. I've got to take this plan seriously! :)

We don't have big vacation plans...just some long weekends planned due to our home construction project, but I am very excited about it!

What are your summer plans?

J