Okay...so today I wore an outfit to work AND I just didn't feel like me. It's like I can only fit into about 1/3 of my clothes. My big girl clothes are not me (well most of them...speaking of work clothes, here). I have some skinny girl (keep in mind this is 145 for me) clothes that I love and feel great in. I felt OLD today. Not me. I wish I had endless funds, but that isn't the case. I keep saying I'll go shopping when I am down a size. You know the drill. Do you ever have this problem?
I look at other women and think...that's how I want my clothes to look on me. Or...I was looking at a catalog today. There were some really cute pants on sale. My first thought...the pants wouldn't look like that on me.
I've told you before that I work in a Christian school. Wednesday our devotion was on God creating us. He made me. He loves me. I should compare myself to Him, not other people. BUT, it is so hard, isn't it!
My oldest daughter says, Why is God's way always the hardest? (during our conversations about the Golden Rule, forgiving and praying for those who aren't nice to you, turning the other cheek, etc)... She makes me smile.
Anyway, I can't wait to feel like me. But I'm working on me in the process. If you haven't read So Long, Insecurity by Beth Moore, I highly recommend it. It is helping me. Of course, I may have to read it 1000 times to truly operate that way, but at least I am recoginizing things about myself...right?
I have lost about 2 pounds, but I think it is more. I know I shouldn't weigh but I CAN'T help it. There is a reason I may weigh a little more for the next few days ;). It may also explain why I'm a little down today.
I'm feeling good about the way things are changing in the scale department. I also did 20 minutes of an easy jog on the treadmill tonight. Woo hoo!
I probably won't be able to post until Monday. Have a wonderful Labor Day!
My choices today:
Breakfast: Deli Flat (whole wheat) with sharp cheddar cheese
Snack: about 10 almonds (short on time...again)
Lunch: a delicious grilled chicken salad, two bites of our chef's homemade mac & cheese, 1/2 slice of garlic bread, low cal ranch (side note: a friend brought me some fries from a local joint during my lunch period. You will be proud to know that I thanked her, kept them in the container, and when she was gone, promptly gave them to the 5th grade teacher who is 26 and a size 0 ...I did good, right? LOL)
Snack: okay, okay...too much bragging above. Did not do so well here. A MINI DOUBLE DOOZY! (2 mini chocolate chip cookies --a little bigger than quarters---glued together with white icing! Oh, it was good. And worth every bite...maybe! Excuse---it was a student's birthday and she brougth it especially for me, I had to eat it.
Dinner: hamburger patty w/ half a bun. side salad.
Lots of water and 2 diet cokes, coffee at work
You are doing very well. So great with the Shred too. Starting next Thursday I will be starting the Shred again. Keep up the great work.
ReplyDeleteHave a great weekend. Take care and God Bless!!!
Cool signature...super easy wasn't it?!
ReplyDeleteI often feel old in my clothes too...I just want to look better in them & wear cute things that I really want to wear. My good friend is taller and 125 lbs. and it doesn't matter what she wears...she always looks cute. It's so hard as women not to compare ourselves.
Enjoy your weekend away...try not to be so hard on yourself!
I feel that way about clothes too. I just try to work through it. Sometimes I'll buy something even if I don't feel comfortable in it. I try to push myself out of my comfort zone, and literally practice having self confidence in what I'm wearing.
ReplyDeleteIf you click on the pink words, "Naturally Peanut Butter Cookies" in my post, it will take you to the original post that has the recipe :)
Hope you like them!
Hear ya about the clothes. I talk to mine, like Goldielocks did. You're too loose there and too tight here, but just right in all the other places. Ugh. I'm going to have to break down and spend some $$s cause none of my winter stuff fits (not that I'm complaining).
ReplyDeleteLove the new J, looks almost identical to my actual signature. My loop of is bigger, other than that, its same. Which makes me wonder, does your J stand for the same J my Jae does?? Hmmm.... :)
Have a great, relaxing long weekend!
It would be so great if we all lived a little closer and could help each other out with clothes along the way to goal. My funds aren't endless either, and I've wasted money a few times on clothes I barely wore because I was, and I emphasize was, losing 10 pounds (1 size) per month.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your weekend!
I know just what you are saying. I have been there. When the weight was coming off faster shopping got to be much more fun. But then I would buy these clothes that I loved and actually get a little sad when I got smaller and they didnt fit. Here the funds are not unlimited either. I am a stay at home mom so a shopping trip is a big deal. Maybe set yourself some money(and time) aside to go shopping and try on all sorts of different things. things never look on me like they do in the catalogs. It is very hard for me to order like that. I used to dread shopping but now I kind of enjoy it because I can find good sales. When i used to be obese i was only able to shop in certain stores and it was way more expensive than my budget allowed.
ReplyDeleteYou are doing a great job!
Jennifer
http://wecanlosethepounds.blogspot.com/
There is an award for you on my blog :)
ReplyDeleteGood job on not eating the fries, epecially just bc someone gave them to you. Bc they were 'there'.........
ReplyDeleteAnd you chose the doozie which I'm guessin' you wanted more than fries. Eating consciously.
Yes, I imagine it is hard in your line of work. All those bday treats coming at you.
Chrissy