Timed Run

Cindy made me sign up for the timed run!!! (see previous post if you are lost)

I am very nervous about this. I'm not really sure why.

I know no one is going to hit me over the head if my time is bad. I know she isn't going to leave me high and dry. And before you go thinking that Cindy is the *Fitness Queen*...she's not. We are in the exact same boat...thank goodness!!!!

We are both dying just to run the whole thing. We have both fallen off the exercise routine in past several years. We know we are starting with a safe 5K to get us going.

I woke up last night wondering what the heck did I get ME into??? But I am excited, too.

I am already SORE.

I don't want to let her down. We are not competing with each other AT ALL. We are completely 100% cheering for one another. Total support.

Cindy wants us to do the "timed run" in case we decide to qualify for BIG races later on! I almost fell off the chair laughing. Cute, huh.

I love her. I couldn't ask for a better best friend.

... Bring it on 2011.
J

I asked her...

If you have been following me for awhile, you know I have a best friend- Cindy. We have been friends for about 14 years. I can tell her anything. Actually, I do tell her everything. She is the type of friend that I tell my worst secrets to and she does not judge me (she knows my actual REAL weight) and she is the 2nd person I call with the BEST news (hubs is the first of course). We've been through the greatest and the worst of times. It is too much to write here. She's had her own drama that I won't write about, but she's been with me when I got married, had 2 babies, dealt with my husband's cancer, and lots more. I am so grateful for her. There have been times that I am sure I would have gone crazy without her.

My husband loves to fish. It takes him away from home frequently. It is his "thing" ...his escape.  I really don't have a hobby like that. When people ask me my hobbies, I struggle....I like to read, spend time with my girls, spend time with my husband, volunteer at my church, teach...do you see a pattern? I don't really do anything for me. I like to read b/c I can do it anywhere. I can stay at home to do it. It doesn't take me away from me the kids. I can do it late at night when they are asleep. Anyhow...I've really been trying to make the workout time for ME lately. I deserve it, right? I have to take care of me. I've been slowly starting to become a runner again. Long ago (before kids), I loved running. I used to run 6 miles a day. I LOVED it. Where did that woman go? I'm trying to find her again.

I had been toying with the idea of asking Cindy to start running races with me. I needed someone to help me, to hold me accountable. I feel to weak, insecure to do it on my own. I used to love the feeling of crossing the finish line. I could not get up the nerve to ask her. Why? It wasn't the fear that she would turn me down. I knew she would say yes. It will give us a chance to see more of each other (she moved 2 hours away a couple years ago).  The real reason I was afraid to ask her was ME. I was afraid to commit. Was I ready for this? Am I really ready to change?

Yes.

I asked her the day before Christmas. My present to us. We will see each other about once a month to run together. We will make a fun weekend out of it, of course. A run followed by fun: shopping, movies, pedicures...whatever we want. We will stay in hotels...girls nights out!!! FUN!!! :) We registered for the first 5K yesterday for mid-February. We began training today. I am a little nervous, but mostly excited. So is she, thank goodness.

This will be my year of change: I will take care of me. (I will still take care of all my loved ones as best as I can, too. But I think I will be even better at it if I am taking good care of myself.)

Wish me luck.
J

A 7 in 2011

I had a fabulous Christmas. My girls are at that wonderful age...come to think of it, all the ages are wonderful so far!!! :) We are truly blessed. We enjoyed celebrating Jesus' birthday, time with family, and lots of good food. I hope all of you did, too!

Well, it is that time of year again.

Time to make changes. Time for resolutions. Time to get serious.

I really don't want this year to be a repeat of last year. A year of starting and stopping diets. Getting on a roll only to fall off AGAIN!

I'm a slogan type of gal. I like to have little sayings and things. (If you read my blog...you know I have "No packing, no snacking" and "It's Just Food (IJF)" ....I've also put up my quote I stole from Debbie, read Inspired that I wrote last week or sometime.

My new slogan is going to be "I want to be a 7 in 2011." I'm saying this with humor...so play along. I figure I will never be a 10 again. Those days are long gone with my twenties. But, I will be perfectly happy being a 7. And it rhymes with 11. So that's my slogan.

I want to start really running. I've been working on that. I'm getting there. I want to be fit and not so jiggly. I want to feel good in clothes. I want to feel good in a crowd of people. I want to be 150 lbs. at the most (I may re-evaluate this number WHEN I get there.---notice I did not say IF I get there.) I want to make healthy eating choices without being an extremist.  I can do this. I will do this.


So...here we go.......
J

A Call For Help

A funny story to share...

***Names have been changed to protect the innocent. :)

About two summer's ago, my friend Christy sent me a text picture message of her in a Spanx garmet like the one in the picture to the left. In the her message it said, "Come help me!!! I am trapped in this Spanx in the dressing room and I am serious!!!"

Well, after I stopped laughing and got up off the floor, I called her.


She was stuck in the dressing room in the Spanx slip!!! She had been trying one on to go under a dress for a wedding. It looked just like this picture...only Christy doesn't quite look like this woman. She is about 5 feet tall and she struggles with her weight....um, especially in her middle and boob section. Are you getting the mental picture yet?

It was hilarious. To her, too. Believe me. She laughs at life and herself. I love her.

She had to rip the tags off that thing. Pay for it. I met her at her house, and we WRESTLED her out of that thing. She wanted to cut it off. I absolutely wouldn't let her due to the cost of said item. I went with the motto: you got into it, we will get you out of it! And...we did. With a lot of tugging and pulling. She may have lost some skin that night, but we both counted it as a workout. Hee hee hee.

Moral to the story...be careful in those durn dressing rooms!!!!

J

Inspired

I read a post by Debbie over at Becoming an Ex Yo-Yo Dieter. You need to read it here. The title is
"The Wholeness of My Spirit." Don't you just love that right off the bat??? I did immediately.

Then, she had this quote that SPOKE to me...

"The wholeness of my spirit has won out over the single-mindedness of the addict."


This is what Debbie wrote about that quote:
 
 "I wrote it down when I was nowhere close to where I am now, but I figured if I told this to myself often enough, perhaps eventually I'd believe it, and when I believed it, I'd finally get to the point where maybe I'd live it."
 
And let me tell you (or you can go over and read about it on her blog) Debbie is living it now. I began reading Debbie's blog when I first began mine. Then I didn't hear from her on her blog for awhile. She travels between Florida and Russia (I think for her husband's job). Then, she started blogging again...and she was ON it! She has dropped weight...and she is back! She looks terrific. You can "see" her spirit in her pictures AND in her writing. She is so happy.
 
I think I am most inspired by Debbie because I relate to her first of all. Her kids are about the same age as mine. We are close in age. She writes like I speak. AND....she was the weight I am. She is the weight I wish to be. I think we all need *role models* in this weight loss battle.
 
I don't want to be miserable anymore. I want my spirit to be renewed. I want to beat my emotional roller coaster addiction with food. I am tired of thinking about it. I want to feel good.
 
The only person who can do this for me is ME. And you know what, my spirit is STRONG. I am in here somewhere. I can find this strength. I can do this. I will do this.
 
So...if you are reading this Debbie, THANK YOU!
 
For real, this time,
J

The Downside to Baggy Clothes

I've lost only a small amount of weight, but my clothes are baggy already. I'm hanging out at 185 pounds right now. I gained a few in the last week...the sweets have been out at my elementary school. But today was my last day, so I'm back on the train. Anyhoo, my pants are baggy even though I've only lost a little weight. Especially in the waist. I always lose there first. Therefore, my pants are hanging LOW.

I really love how this feels, but it doesn't look very good. AND, it makes me feel like I can EAT. Middle of last week, I was weighing around 182. I was feeling good. Thinking the 170s were close. My pants were loose. People were noticing the change. I cheated once. Thinking to myself, I can afford this...(my pants are so loose!)...happened again the next day...the next day...still happening today. See where I'm going with this.

I think the BAGGY PANTS are bad for me. Tight pants make me feel like I can't eat! They are a constant reminder of why I don't need the triple chocolate cookies my room mom made especially for me. :) Yes, the were SO good!

However, I cannot afford to buy new pants for every size. I like to buy new pants about every other size. For example, my pants are 14s now. So I probably won't buy new ones until I am a 10. Any advice here??? Anyone else have this problem???

I should be back to more regular blogging now that school is out for Christmas break...whew!

:)
J

Don't step off the cliff

I feel like I've been telling myself that for the past two days. I feel like I am standing on the edge of the cliff. Dangerously close to slipping back to my old ways. Why? I'm not too sure. I am feeling stressed. I do have a slight cold again, so I'm not feeling my best AGAIN. I think my family just keeps passing the sniffles around. But, I really think it is being busy that is getting to me. I am feeling rushed all the time. I like things calm. I like to be home.

Food is being brought to my school...treats. Yummy ones.

I keep reminding myself of the wedding video. I keep repeating my mantra of  "it's just food."

{My skinny friend from the wedding saw her picture in the book and said "oh, look how boney I am!" I looked at her like she was absolutely crazy. I mean, really? Can she even say that in front of me? Is that allowed? I think I want to be too boney...do I? Yes, I want the reverse problem today.}

Anyhoo...I am feeling a little strung out, but I am holding my own. I did eat 3 Whoppers. (you know the chocolate covered malt balls). Yum. They were worth it. AND, I had a little extra pasta at lunch. But, other than that, I am still under control. But, my mind is racing with ideas for out-of-control-eating. I am going shopping tomorrow... so I will have to be VERY careful!

Good luck to all of you,
J